I married a wonderful man. I may get pissed at him from time to time and he may aggravate me to the point of tears but all in all, I could not have been paired with a better man to be on this journey with.
Today we had a little chat. I told him I was sorry for being such a shitty wife. (we have not had sex since before the egg retrieval-in DECEMBER) He said there was no need for apologies and "I am ready when you are ready. I am a patient person" I said that he must be getting frustrated and he said he isn't (I am sure he was lying) when I repeated it a few times he said "I think I was frustrated at first but now I understand it more." I told him that I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to cheat on me (I added "I would never forgive you and I would leave you but I wouldn't be surprised) He said NEVER and I know he is being truthful.
We also talked about the FET and he again said "I am ready for that whenever you are." He said that he wants it to work out so bad but he is scared of the roller coaster we went through with IVF again. Of course he is, we both are.
I am very fortunate to have such an amazing husband. IF is not an easy thing to deal with and it takes a big toll on your marriage, I am one of the lucky ones who found a real partner to go through it all with, especially when the IF issues lie within my body.
I think the one thing that came out of our IF journey was the amazing strength in our relationship. We learned so much about each others strengths, compassion and patience as well as how deep and unlimited our love for each other. I can't imagine being with another man through this and we are such a strong unified couple.
ReplyDeleteIF can break you down, but when you have a relationship that strengthens, it can also unify you like no other experience ever could. I'm glad you have D with you through this and that you are so amazing together.