My very close friend is pregnant.
She has suffered 2 losses in the exact same way. She gets to about 7 weeks and there is no heartbeat. The second time she saw a heartbeat and then it stopped a week or 2 later. The first time, she went for her ultrasound around 11-12 weeks and the baby had stopped developing around 7weeks.
So here she is pregnant again. Her betas are being monitored weekly. It went from 830 to 7474 and then to over 30,000. Things are looking AMAZING. She is having bouts of nausea, she is moody and hormonal. But the poor girl is stressed. She is worried that there is a black cloud of doom hanging over her and nobody can get her to stop it. I just need for her to get past the point where she got devastating news last time and then I hope she can calm down.
She has a feeling this weekend that it is over. She says she knows her body and that she just has that gut feeling. I choose to remain hopeful for her because she deserves this and will be an amazing mom. But you cannot convince her to stop worrying. And I don't blame her. She knows nothing but getting to this point and then getting that horrible news.
Monday she will see a doctor, get an ultrasound and I can only cross everything I have and hope with everything I have that she will see that flicker of a heartbeat on the screen and she will be able to breathe and enjoy this pregnancy and prepare for her future as a mom. Because life cannot be that cruel to rip away this gift from her again and again. It just cannot.
I will pray for your friend. I can honestly tell you that it won't stop for her, even on Monday. I felt that cloud of doom well into my second trimester. Until i started feeling the baby move on a regular basis. That was the only thing that could reassure me because every twinge, pain, feeling of "offness" before that let the fear that my body was betraying me back in. It's one of the horrible things survivors have to live with...Never feeling completely safe about a pregnancy. Please keep us up to date on your friend and know that you are doing an amazing thing caring so much and having so many people around the world add their prayers to hers.
ReplyDeleteHugs.
I'm sending out thoughts and prayers to your friend... and crossing my fingers that this time will turn out differently.
ReplyDeleteI am thinking and praying for your friend. I hope everything works out.
ReplyDelete